• Police Dad

This week's update.

Let me start off this post by apologizing for not writing more lately. My bride is trying to slowly kill me and I didn't want to interrupt her plans to stop and write.

We all know that moving sucks, but I'm not so sure now that the weeks after moving in don't suck a lot worse! The more things I scratch off my "honey-get-your-butt-up-and-do" list the more I have to add to it.

I am proud to inform you all that the new fence is up and looks great. I should be happy about that right? All I can think about now is getting it stained. We aren't talking about a small job here, huh-uh, we are talking 409 feet of 6-foot fence. Anybody bored and want a project to keep you busy??

We have finished a little more painting. Just for the record, I would rather slow dance with a pissed off skunk than paint walls and trim! And to the people who decided it would be a good idea to paint the entire house doo-doo brown, I hope the fleas of a thousand camels infest your armpits!

Much Better.

Let me tell you about my cool neighbor across the street. His name is Fred (not really) and he is one of the smoothest dudes I have ever seen. He is an older gentlemen and is retired from Dr. Pepper (yes, I single-handedly paid for his retirement), and his yard looks amazing.

He waters it with a hose almost every day; he sprays the weeds daily, and he picks up anything that might have blown into his yard each day, as well as sticks and other natural discards. The cool part is; he does all of that from his golf cart! He even takes the trash cans down his driveway to the curb with his golf cart. He does everything from that cart. The only time he is not riding his golf cart is when he is riding his lawn mower. Checks the cart. Chats with cart. Chases his wife around the cart. If I were rich, I would have that sucker custom painted for him.

Here in our new house we have a really nice back-porch area. It has a pergola over it and is a pretty big "L" shape. Part of the porch is under cover with a ceiling fan, and the rest is covered by the pergola. I spent most of the day yesterday hanging a string of heavy duty outdoor decorative lights on the pergola and I am very pleased with how it turned out. I am telling y'all this because it is pretty much the ONLY job I have completed that turned out the way I wanted it to!

I also have a nice huge shop out back, something that I have wanted my entire adult life. We have been here about 3 weeks now and the only time I have got to spend in there is to put in or get out boxes or tools and it is starting to really hurt my heart. Maybe one day soon. The main reason I haven't gone out there and started setting it up is because I am self-aware enough to know that once I bride is going to have pure hell getting me back in the house to finish up her to-do list. I have fully and completely adopted the mantra "Happy Wife, Happy Life" so for now I will resist the call of my shop.

Til next time.....Y'all be safe and healthy!

26 views0 comments

©2019 by Fruit Loops in the Dryer Vent. Proudly created with